I took a day off from writing yesterday. It was nice but I missed it. So I am back at it today, although out of order. I got really sunburned on Sunday so I am trying to avoid the sun which is something I never do. I promised the dogs a beach walk today and in order to honor that commitment, I had to go early. So I walked the beach instead of writing first thing. I am grateful that my mentality allows for that today. It didn’t used to...if I missed the timing window, it was off the table for that day. I was so rigid. Now, things are more flexible...I am more flexible.
So I walked the beach at low tide, very few people but several dogs. The dogs having been successful at holding their owners accountable for their promise. It was a glorious day, which I hope to never take for granted. I live in paradise and I never want to forget that. I love it here and get to live this life.
Today since there were no looming deadlines, no places to be, no emails to return or send, no children to corral, no agendas to satisfy, I meandered the beach. I walked aimlessly for hours. Since it was low tide, I was able to crouch in the tidal pools and watch sea life dance to and fro with the tidal surge.
As I walked and took it all in, I saw that I was in fact seeing life...sea life, see life. I saw life. I saw it in the tiny crabs hurriedly burying themselves in the sand. I saw it in the birds hunting for breakfast, I saw it in the starfish clinging to its rocky savior, I saw it in the dogs running up and down the beach chasing birds real and imagined. I saw it in myself. My legs supporting the weight of my being and carrying me onward, forward, walking, seeing life in sea life.
I see life all the time yet I still often miss life. I get so wrapped up in all the mundanity of my daily grind that I miss seeing life. The tiny connections, the seemingly insignificant happenings, the things that vex me, irk me, worry me, taking center stage and truncating my world view until all I can see really occurs only in my mind. The world outside is crowded out as my thoughts spin story after self absorbed story.
I realized today as I aimlessly wandered with no destination in mind, that I was not consumed by my head. My life was not occurring inside myself as usual but in the tidal pools, the crashing waves, the scurrying of a sideways dancing crab. In the birds overhead running from my dog whose sole mission in life is to catch one...and she never, ever does. My life was occurring all around me, and I was seeing life in the sea life.
I felt the warmth of the sun on my tanned legs. I felt strong and present and joyful and alive. I may never get another day like to today but today I saw life. I saw it in everything that happened as I walked. I saw it in every speck of sand, every drop of water. I saw myself in it all and all of it inside of me. And I enjoyed it. I relished. I savored. I let it go...
The dogs crashed the surf, having an experience of their own. Me a mere spectator to their canine world view. I do not know if what they saw, the see life from their perspective produced a greater result for them, but it did for me...
I guess what I am trying to say is that I saw life today, in its myriad of forms, beautiful, ugly, twisted, smelly, unadulterated messiness. Life, lived. See life. Really all you have to do is open your eyes and life will take care of the rest.