Dear Jane Doe...

I can’t imagine how you are feeling right now.  The feelings of being supported and denigrated at the very same time...all you have endured, all you have been through, all you must walk through moving forward.

The internet is alive with the spark you set off by refusing to be silent.  And the other women who knew of your story and refused to let it go.  Your courage is important for your own healing, but also to encourage other women to step out of the shadows of sexual assault and come forward into the light.  You are now a beacon to other women.  And there are so many other women!

I hope you feel supported and loved and believed.

I hope you are surrounded by people who love you and have your back.

I hope you wake up every day and feel a little bit better.

I hope you know that your strength is changing things for women.

I hope you know that your courage is inspiring others.

I hope you know you are not alone. Sadly there are so very many of us out here in the world.

I hope you know that your experience is helping others not feel so alone, isolated, unbelieved, damaged and terrified.

I don’t believe you started any of this with the idea that the internet would explode with outrage from women everywhere. 

I don’t believe you could even know how much your story, your experience would resonate around the world.

I don’t believe that any of the support you are currently receiving makes up for the way it all went down two years ago.

I don’t believe that any of this is easy and I want you to know that I think of you all the time.  I pray for your safety, your healing, your mental health.  I pray for you to keep going even though it is hard and scary and overwhelming...

This is how things change.  Fucked up stuff goes down. Men behave badly and it continues until one of us says, “ENOUGH!”  

Until one of us is brave enough to say, “I WILL NOT LET THIS SLIDE!”

Until one of us is determined enough to “NOT LET OUR TRAGEDY GO UNREPORTED, UN-INVESTIGATED AND UNKNOWN!”

Until one of us “WILL NOT STAY SILENT ANYMORE!”

And that is you.

You are that person now.

You have said “ENOUGH!”

You have said “I WILL NOT LET THIS SLIDE”

You have said, “I WILL NOT LET MY TRAGEDY GO UNREPORTED, UNINVESTIGATED AND UNKNOWN!”

You have said, “I WILL NOT STAY SILENT ANYMORE!”

And we have heard you.

We believe you.

We are here for you.

We are in solidarity with you, for you, along side you.

This happened to you, because it has happened to so many of us, forever.  And so many of us remained silent.  So many of us doubted ourselves, our behavior, our clothing, our part.  

They win when we accept the blame shifting.

They win when we allow them to bully us into silence.

They win when we allow the shame of what they did to us to become our shame.

They have won...

Until now.

Your courage to speak your truth, to put your experience out there has become a beacon for other survivors.  

We see.

We know.

We hear you.

We have been there.

I just want you to know what you are doing is going to help some other woman not have the same fate.  Help some other woman make sense of what happened to her.  Help some other woman have the courage to heal.

YOUR EXPERIENCE MATTERS.  WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU MATTERS.

AND WE ARE ALL OUTRAGED AT THE WAY CORNELL HANDLED THIS.

WE ARE ALL OUTRAGED BY THE PATHETIC ATTEMPTS TO SHIFT THE BLAME.

WE ARE ALL OUTRAGED THAT MEN DO THIS TO WOMEN OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN FOR EONS AND NOTHING CHANGES.

I pray, for you, for us all that your story, your life changes that for all of us.  I pray that you see that your experience can benefit others.  That you never wanted this to be your life, but it is and it has vital meaning for us all.  And we thank you.  We honor you.  We are here for you.

Again, still...

Always.