I Don't Chase...

Well, I don’t chase anymore.  I used to, I was like a lion running down a gazelle.  I chased everything: jobs, men, ideas, money, success, friends, relationships, stuff.  I ran it all down.  I was in constant motion and I believed, quite irrationally, that I could and would be able to get what I wanted and needed by chasing.

I am not sure where it happened that I stopped all the chasing.  I am pretty sure it was 2022.  Although I think it started a little earlier, hell, perhaps my whole life has been leading up to where I am right now.  I don’t chase, I attract.

All that striving to get somewhere, something, has just ceased.  I mean, that isn’t to say that I don’t want things anymore, quite to the contrary.  I do totally see how I play a part in the progress of my life.  I have to do the footwork.  I have to set intentions, have goals and then do the work to bring about the best conditions for those changes to take place...

But I am no longer willing to beat myself bloody to get there.  I am not going to run myself ragged to get something or someone that is illusive and out of reach.  I trust, today, that if it doesn’t flow in, then it just isn’t likely meant for me.

I do my best to just live my life and allow the universe to be in charge of what comes and what leaves.  I try to practice the open hand loving concept.  My job is not to clutch or grab, my job is to just have my palms open, allowing that which is meant for me to land and stay as long as it likes, and then trust that if it remains, it is meant to and if it flies off and away, that too is meant to happen as well...

The flower doesn’t chase the bees or butterflies.  The flower attracts.  And that is what my life has kind of turned into today.  I am no longer grasping at the things (for the most part - I mean old habits die hard...) I trust that everything I want or need shall come, if and when it is meant for me.  And even though there are some things in my life that I would really like to have right now (a job and a relationship) I trust that the absence of these things is also a gift and I will miss the gift of them by refusing to see and love the life I have without those things...

I don’t chase, I attract, everything finds its way back...or not.

Again, still...