I was tired yesterday. A full day at Six Flags then a seven mile hike with gym sore muscles wiped me out. I took it easy in the afternoon, getting a little sun on my deck. Visiting with a friend that I don’t see often enough. And then I was just done. Tired. Wiped. So I decided to take a nap...
The weather was so amazing that I decided to take a nap in my swing bed on the porch. There was a light breeze and the sun was radiant. It seemed like the perfect plan.
I got myself arranged and was soon joined by Lulu who is my ever faithful companion. She is the dog that escorts me to the bathroom (every single time) lest I lose my way, waits for me outside the shower (every single time), throws a temper tantrum when I go somewhere (like the mailbox) and have the audacity to not take her with me. We are enmeshed, what can I say?
So it was no surprise to me that she wanted to join me for my outdoor nap. I got myself settled and then she joined me, laying down stretched out in front of the swing so that her torso covered the entire front of the swing. There was no way Louie (our other dog) or an intruder could possibly get to me without going through her. She was really more concerned with Louie than an intruder...she does not like me paying ANY attention to him.
So there we were, me in the swing bed, her stretched before it. And so we napped.
It was so peaceful. The sun filtered through the wisteria vines into a soft glow. Me peaceful and restful. Lulu down and breathing peacefully at my side. It might have been the best nap I have ever had. Seriously.
I am not a napper. I am more of a doer, a go’er. But yesterday for whatever reason, I was tired. And I was grateful that I could take a few moments to give myself what I seemed to need, more sleep.
When I awoke twenty minutes later, I was so out of it that I was disoriented. I didn’t know what day it was, where I was or why the hell I was asleep in the middle of the day and how did I get outside? How awesome is that? Twenty minutes of rest in the day time when I am normally pushing and moving about, was enough to unmoor me from reality and give me a little reorientation to life.
I reached down and Lulu was still there, lying peacefully at my side, breathing soft dog sounds of rest and relaxation. I realized that we both had just accomplished something unusual for both of us: down time. She a border collie and me, well, me. Makes down time something of a passing fad. We just don’t really engage in it all that much. But yesterday, we napped like pros.
But the best part of the nap was that I didn’t immediately rise and get on with things. I laid there looking skyward, arm draped off the swing, petting her and she too resisted returning to our previously scheduled life. We just lay there, her thinking whatever things a dog thinks and me thinking whatever random ass things that I think.
The nap was divine. But the rest after the nap was glorious. She and I, outside on a warm Sunday afternoon, lying in the sun, celebrating the life that we have that would allow for so much nothingness to be so full of life. Resting repose with time for reflection and appreciation of the grace that can only come on a lazy Sunday afternoon napping with your dog in the warm February air. Fuck, it felt amazing. So much so, that it has now become something I long for...like the caress of a lover who knows your body intimately, like the hug of your child filled with need, like the purr from your cat while she pins you to the couch, like the laughter you can only have with someone who knows you so well, that what is really funny is how much you know what the other is thinking, that words are not really required...the laughter speaks for itself. Those times. Those life times where you are present and aware of just how blessed you are to be human and conscious.
If you haven’t tried it, I strongly suggest an outdoor nap with your dog...it was sublime. And I am somehow a better person for it. Maybe not from your perspective, but from hers. I know my dog thinks I am a better person for taking the time to just be with her. And I know that me taking the time to give her and myself something we both needed has helped me be out of my own way a little more. To be present in this life, showing up for whatever comes and trusting that everything that happens on the path is here for me to wake up to the fact that life is this beautiful unfolding love story. Loving yourself so that you may in fact love others. Most especially if you are blessed enough to have the love and adoration of a very lovely dog. If you are, nap with her every chance you get!
I was apparently too out of it to get a photo of our moment...so this is the best I could do...