The Reward of Seeing...

I spent Sunday walking the beach for hours.  Just a meandering walk, noticing all the little things.  I found beach glass along the way and I noticed things that I might have missed other wise.  I heard the chatter of the gulls, the grunts and growls of sea lions and seals.  I heard the motoring by of boats and the overhead drum of small planes.  I heard the lapping waves on the rocky shore.  And I have walked beaches like this all over the world and been given the same gifts I found on Sunday.  There is something in me that just loves to get lost for a little while, no people, no conversation, no music, just being present in the world, without armor, defense, or care.

The thing about seeing is you have to really be patient to actually see anything at all.  In order to find sea glass on the beach, or a starfish in a tidal pool, you have to be really patient, you have to be willing to slow yourself down in order to see anything at all.  You have to be patient and really want to see in order to discover new things about things that you think you already know everything about...

So I walked the beach with no destination in mind, no agenda to be followed, no timetable to adhere to.  I just walked the beach aimlessly and I discovered the voice in my head is much better at being quiet.  The driving force that is always within me is capable of dropping into a lower gear.  I am a being that can just exist allowing my mind to take a back seat to what my sensing and perceiving abilities can do when I get out of my own way.

I felt the sun on my shoulders

I felt the breeze on my skin

I felt the sand on my toes

I heard the cries of birds and the honks of pinnipeds 

I heard the undulation of the waves

I heard the absence of chatter between my ears

I saw the animals living their lives

I saw the waves coming and going without any concern for what lies in its path

I saw the anchovies beaching themselves and felt alarm and sadness for their ending

I picked up those same fish and threw them back into the sea, hoping to allow them just a little more time to be here with us

I picked up sea glass and put it in my pocket

I picked myself instead of allowing fear and drive to take over and curtail my walk

Sometimes the reward of patience is seeing everything more clearly.  And sometimes, the reward of patience is to be lost to yourself and everyone else for a little while.  And then again, sometimes the reward of patience is a whole host of things that vex you and cause you to wish you never endeavored to be patient at all.

And sometimes on a random Sunday afternoon, on a beach far from home, you discover new things about old subjects, which would include yourself.  Sometimes you realize you know only a little, and just when you think you know all there is to know about anything at all, you realize you know a little bit more than nothing at all...

Again, still...